S6E2 REVIEW — Schitt’s Creek: Who Wet the Bed?
by Ian Carlos Crawford
Previously on Schitt’s Creek: David and Patrick have started to plan their wedding, Alexis isn’t leaving to see Ted for another month. Also, Moira’s movie is back on.
The opening with David waking up — I was worried it would be Patrick who wet the bed and David would be a nightmare about it but I’m glad it was the other way around. As someone who has maybe possibly once wet the bed after a drunken hookup, I might possibly know the embarrassment of wetting the bed as an adult while another man lies next to you. Might.
Patrick asks if the pee is blood — which reminded me of the hilarious season 1 episode opener where Johnny Rose wakes up with the ceiling leaking brown water on his forehead and Moira first asks if it’s blood. Patrick is then annoyingly perfect about it because of course he is! This show is feeding my need for a perfect boyfriend even more than my god damned mother does! I feel like most of my exes would have gotten out of bed, glared at me, and said ew. And ya know what? I’d probably do the same! I am also not a Patrick, I’m very clearly a David Rose but also who isn’t this is just like how everyone is a Liz Lemon.
Patrick says cute things like, “David, I’m perfect, let me clean up your piss while you shower!” And David is, understandably, still upset. What David needed to learn to do was not say a word to the guy, and wake up, still drunk, and wash yourself off in the bathroom then go lay back down and make him get up and leave before you got up is what one might say if they’d also wet the bed as an adult.
Moira does a social media takeover as promo for the upcoming The Crows Have Eyes III: The Crowening. It’s perfect how two times characters recall her saying she hated social media but that the moment her tweets start getting likes she is beyond obsessed. I mean, who the hell wouldn’t watch a livestream from beloved TV and film star Moira Rose? Not unlike Ted’s accidental onlyfans-esque livestream from season 3 which I would *also* watch. God I miss Ted.
While David and Patrick are bickering in the store, Moira enters livestreaming to all her new “frans” — a term David immediately shuts down. Also, a term I’m positive some 90s celebrities used on social media a few years ago. We find out, via Moira, that David wetting the bed happens when he gets anxious and that he’s probably just anxious about their upcoming wedding. Moira calls it his “nighttime oopsy daisy.” So, it’s not a drunk one-time thing like it maybe was with the writer of this piece. It’s a cute rare moment between Moira and Patrick that we soon find out also ended up on her livestream because she forgot to turn it off before putting her phone down.
Meanwhile in the C plot, Johnny Stevie, and Roland go to see a hotel Johnny is interested in adding to the Rosebud name. It ends up being a funeral for the owner because Roland is forever the worst at his job and most things. It’s awkward and the least interesting part of the episode but sure. It leads us to the really tender moment where Stevie tells Johnny she actually isn’t interested in pursuing a career with Rosebud. Johnny wants a franchise and she wants to get out of her hometown and explore. Johnny, for all his bumbling and bad choices, is such a good dad who tries his best. Johnny hopes she changes her mind but gives her his blessing. My hope is Stevie gets to do both — the show ends with them starting a franchise that allows Stevie to travel (because, while I want her to live her truth, I also want financial stability for my soft goth babygirl).
Alexis finds out Moira accidentally livestreamed her convo with the boys and panics but also laughs. It’s a perfect Alexis moment. She knows it’s bad but also can’t stop getting a kick out of her brother’s embarrassment. They discuss it with Patrick and everyone is panicking while Alexis can’t help but smirk every once in a while about it. They eventually keep David away from the internet until it’s all blown over — but as we knew from earlier seasons, David doesn’t do social so it’s fairly easy.
The episode ends on a super cute note of David and Patrick back in bed being super annoyingly fucking cute and no I’m not bitter that I don’t have a Patrick of my own why do you ask.
Best Moment: Moira shouting out to “Wine and Cat Gal 74” and saying she hopes she can stop crying soon fucking el oh el
Favorite Outfit: David’s pajama shirt that was black that said “LOVE” in red letters in the corner.
About the Author:
Ian Carlos Crawford grew up in southern New Jersey and, like most people from NJ, he graduated from Rutgers University. He then graduated from New School with an MFA in nonfiction writing. His writing has appeared on sites like Geeks Out, BuzzFeed, NewNowNext, and other random corners of the internet. He currently co-hosts a podcast about his favorite thing, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, called Slayerfest 98 and is shopping around his fiction manuscript. Follow him on Twitter @ianxcarlos.
